xbox 360: viva piñata.

I found this old spot from Xbox 360 on one of my favourite blogs, The Denver Egotist. It came out about 18 months ago, which is approximately 1,000,000,000 in blog years, but I don’t care because it’s fucking awesome. I feel a little bit of shame, because I’m not sure how I missed this the first time around, but I also feel tingly in my special places, because this ad is completely hilarious.

It’s turning me into one of those people that just randomly quote something and giggle at how funny I think I am. It’s obnoxious, but I can’t… resist… about to… quote…:

“For you, a pet cobra”.

C’mon. That shit is gold.

In my obsessive perusing of the interwebs, I came across a long version of the ad. Almost too long. I can see why they edited it down to a minute, but it’s interesting to look at how the idea changes between the long and short versions. The succinct version is funnier, plus the visual button where the piñata jumps into the bushes totally ices the cake. With the ending cut from the long version, it relies a little too heavily on the list of magic items and the kids’ reactions, which, though totally funny, get a bit laboured after a while.

It does, however, deliver what is possibly the single greatest line of copy ever created in a main-stream commerical. I’ll let you watch and guess what it is…

That’s right folks. “To crush your enemies. To see them driven before you and to hear the lamentations of their women”. I realize I’m quoting again, and I may need someone to save me from myself. It doesn’t get any better than that. We’re talkin’ about some old skool Greek tragedy shit right there. Although “vigilante justice” scores points with me too. Fuck, more quotes.

…”The skulls of the vanquished”. Ok I’m done. … For now.


  1. Hum, too many “god” iterations in my comment. Just wipe the first away.

  2. God, the long version script is golden. “A gun with one bullet”, for god’s sake.

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